The Notebook is Being Sent...

I'm a bad person. I know.

Anywho, to make up for it... *wink*... I wrote up... something.

I don't want to say I'll work on it, because if I do, I won't. :)

But it is legendary - it's my first attempt at a stageplay musical.

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ACT I
Scene 1

The stage is black, and people are talking in the wings. It's like every other high school theater rehearsal - loud and disorganized.

STACIE
Lights up, Crew! Come on! Work with me here!

Lights come up brightly on Stacie, CS. She flinches away until they dim slightly, and then glares towards the sound box. She shakes her head and starts to mumble angrily into her headset as she exits DSL. A moment after she exits, hard rock music starts to blare and she runs out again to DSL for a moment and points at the sound box angrily before exiting again. All of the kids start to filter in on stage, the girls in skirts (some in ankle-length leggings as well), uncoordinated shirts, and character shoes; the boys in assorted types of shorts and shirts with character shoes.

HICKS
(offstage)
Stretches everyone!

Everyone begins to fake stretching, complaining and talking among themselves.
In the midst of it all, LUCIE, in the front center, is talking to REENA about the stupidity of stretching.

REENA
I don't see WHY we have to do it - we're doing the small dances first, and I mean, push-ups?!

LUCIE nods.

LUCIE
Yeah, I'm pretty sure no one understands.

LUCIE shakes her head.

REENA
Well someone needs to speak up. Doing stretches is sports bras, tights, heels, and skirts isn't exactly my definition of humane.

LUCIE
Amen, sister.
(She laughs.)
Maybe it's some kind of cruel and unusual punishment they decided to use on high school kids.

REENA
Quite the possibility.

LUCIE
Ooh, maybe-

HICKS
VOCAL STRETCHES, EVERYONE! SING OUT!

The group has a few scattered moans as HICKS begins playing the vocal stretches on her piano. There are a few scattered moans and groans.

GROUP
(singing, in a low register.)
AaaAAAAAAaaaaaAAAaaaa....
(One pitch higher.)
AaaAAAAAAAAaaaaaAAAaaa...

LUCIE
(singing to Reena - the group does the excersize between every line of the song.)
Don't want to sing,
Don't want to dance,
I'd rather hear Lloyd Garret Rant.

LLOYD
(jumping and shouting angrily above the group)
THIS IS INJUSTICE! DOES THE SUPREME COURT...

LUCIE looks fed up. LLOYD's voice fades out with the "aaas" - DYLAN steps forward, still stretching and singing.

DYLAN
(singing)
I hate these shoes,
I hate this pitch,
My mother got me into all of this 'cause she's quite the angry-

GROUP
(Loudly, cutting DYLAN off.)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaAAAAAaaa!

DYLAN gives the people around him, who are glaring at him, a 'whatever' look and throws his hands up. The group moves around sluggishly - LUCIE ends up on USL, DYLAN on USR.

LUCIE AND DYLAN
(singing together)
This was not my choice to be involved,
And I'm thinking that Ms. Hicks might be the Devil,
But now for seven hours every school day,

HICKS
(cheerily singing)
And holidays!

DYLAN
(looking bored, singing)
I've turned into a theatre slave.

REENA and TREY step up to the front, blending in for the most part. HICKS motions at everyone to sing.

REENA
(singing)
I had no clue,
It'd be like this,
I just assumed we'd dance and laugh, you get the jist?

TREY
I know I do.
(singing)
For forty bucks,
I bought the shoes,
But now my feet are swollen and the blisters smell and spit out ooze.

Reena gives him a disgusted look from across the stage.

REENA
Very gross.

TREY
You're telling me.

REENA AND TREY
(singing together)
This was my mistake to sign the list,
Since we already knew what this entitled,
But now for seven hours every day that we're not dying,

REENA
(speaking, clearly with spite)
We're stuck in a dirty nasty auditorium with no air conditioning and shoes that smell like something curled up and DIED in them because no one in this entire production can seem to remember that YES,
(yelling now)
HYGIENE IS AN ISSUE!

Everything goes quiet. Everyone OS focuses on REENA curiously.
REENA looks around and smiles shyly.

REENA
(singing awkwardly)
Ha-ha-ha, just kidding, I was lying...?

HICKS slams the keyboard in a single note, and the cast starts moving around, and then, after humming a small part of it softly...

GROUP
(singing)
None of us you see in front of you,
Really knew what we were getting into.
We signed a contract - these people are tough,
And now we're just trying to survive,

TREY
(singing)
The torture,

LUCIE
(singing)
The aching,

REENA
(singing)
The reputation,

DYLAN
(singing)
The shame in,

GROUP
(singing)
THE PAIN IN!
BEING A DRAMA BUFF!